Wednesday, February 16, 2011

My mind ,heart and soul! Dealing with depression!

Everything on the outside is perfectly happy! I have spent the last few years realizing the people around you can only help you achieve happiness NOT make you happy!

I have fought and battled depression for many years ..since I was a teen. I go through various stages of depression some more severe than others. God has helped me in so many ways to deal with it ,but I feel this time I am having an even worse time "shaking" this bout.

EVERYthing  else in my life is wonderful! Great God, Great husband and Great family. SO WHY CAN I NOT FEEL HAPPY INSIDE?
My mind, heart and soul feel so heavy some days!

I have tried so hard this time to not revert to medication, but I am leaning that way again. Every three to four years I have these periods of depression. I have taken meds 3 times in my life... I have to return to it..get straightened out chemically , then I will be fine for a few years! Why do I torture myself to deal with my depression? BECAUSE we Americans over medicate! You can rarely get me to take tylenol!

 This depression that I feel bleeds over into my family life I know!! I try so hard to be Happy, Smile , Laugh and adjust . I am getting so tired ,sleepy and want to cry all the time! FOR NO REASON!!!  This is one the most honest blogs!  Many people try to hide it! I am finally embracing it and going to get it taken care of!  God knows I have tried other methods! Please pray for me !! I am almost excited to see what can become of this..will I become the "OLD" me  or is it to late? Maybe this is the big one ! ARGGGGG!

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